Screaming For Vengeance

So there I am, sitting quietly in the teacher’s room. Everything is relatively peaceful for once, it’s a nice sunny day. Maybe a little chilly, but nothing if not serene. I’m starting to feel a little sleepy, actually, nodding off a bit as I aimlessly flip through a book.

Then all of a sudden, every window in the building starts shaking like it’s trying to leap out of the frame and run away. There’s a terrible howling outside, like a hungry beast baying for blood. I look around out there, without getting too close to the obviously possessed windows, and I see crap flying around everywhere. People’s bikes are rattling in the racks. Trees are bending over.

It’s not an earthquake. It’s the freaking wind.

I look over at Kyoto-sensei, who can obviously see I’m a little freaked out. I’d like to emphasize he’s barely glanced up from his paperwork since this started. He looks out the window for a moment and then smiles knowingly. “Kogarashi”, he says. “Japanese winter wind. Very cold.”

And then, like somebody hit a switch, it suddenly stops. And everything is quiet again. Utterly calm.

Just thought you should know the kind of stuff I have to deal with here. 

Blow, wind, and crack your cheeks! Rage, blow!

Screamin’ demons yell
Bursting through the clouds

 

I’m Back

…and I’m half-dead due to the fact I seem to have caught the Black Death. Or maybe it’s just a cold, I can’t tell anymore.

Reports of the sojourn in my homeland will have to wait until I am no longer spewing mucus from most of my orifices like some kind of goddamn virus factory. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to try and find some orange juice. And an exorcist.

Bleah.

…And we’re off!

Flying out to Ottawa for the school trip tomorrow.  So no updates for a while, but probably a massive one when I return.

Dawn of Victory

Sports Day has come and gone, and what an exciting day it was. It’s much easier to just show the photos than try to describe it. If you’re wondering why there’s no photos of the boys’ races, it’s because I was impromptu drafted, along with Kyoto-sensei, into participating in the first race (for fun, not really competing), and then I sat in the middle of the field with the kids until the boys were done. Overall, it was a lot of fun.

Sports Day ‘08

No pictures of the enkai because I forgot my camera. After a long and treacherous drive up the side of a mountain, listening to sensei’s engine howl like a banshee, we made it to the hotel, Kassel. It was done up like a German hunting lodge, but with tennis courts and (inexplicably) a huge picture of a Highlander in the foyer. We had dinner out on the terrace, with little grills and huge plates of beef, seafood and veggies. The food was pretty good, and I ended up eating some things I wouldn’t have tried otherwise. I ate whole ika (squid), tentacles and all, and most of a fish on a stick. I just couldn’t eat the head; some lines I’m not ready to cross.

Then of course, there was the drinking. To excess. Again. Shochu (potato liquor) is pretty good, but I still prefer saki. Many of the teachers seem to be impressed by my alcohol tolerance. Even one or two beers seem to knock them pretty loopy. After 3 or so pints of beer, a big glass of shochu and about half a bottle each of red and white wine, we retired to the lounge for chatting. I’m not exactly sure, but my Japanese comprehension seems to increase as I have more to drink. Some of us then spent the night at the hotel, which I don’t really remember. And the morning was pretty rough too. I forgot that wine always seems to make the next day worse.

I’m not sure either, but I think one of the teachers challenged me to a foot race later this week. As out of shape as I am, I think this is a forgone conclusion, but we’ll have to see.

With your holy armour, the steel in your hand
Fly, angel of bloody revenge!

More pictures: The Festival, August 19th.

Here’s some photos I took during the festival in Shino (I think it’s called that) on August 19th. A lot of fun. The highlights: the fireworks went on for like two hours, everybody gawked at us gaijin, we practically ran like startled gazelles away from a group of pretty young women who said “Hello” to us, we remonstrated ourselves for the same, I discovered a new love in takoyaki (fried octopus dumplings), and finally one of the Andrew’s teachers invited us back to his home to help finish off all the sushi and liquor he had bought.

Festival, August 19th (Shino)

Also, I will share this. I bought some kind of robot mask during the festival because I thought it looked cool, and Lester managed to turn my shame into humour. It’s animated, so be sure to watch. Also, refrain from drinking Coke while watching. I speak from experience.

Uwaaaaah!!!

Just to clarify…

If I seem to be ranting a lot this week, it’s because this is Obon week in Asago. It’s a yearly festival that everyone spends with their families. Unfortunately, most of the teachers at my school don’t live around here, and since it’s a holiday there’s no one at the school except me and the vice-principal. So, I have some free time on my hands, and as my friends know, when I get bored, I find things to get angry about.

Next week though should be more interesting. There is going to be an exchange trip to Ottawa in September, and the dozen or so students who are going will be coming in to practice their English. So I’ll have more to do and I’ll get to spend some time with the students. Perhaps I will try to convince them Canadians do indeed have bear cavalry. 

Also there’s a half-day seminar for ALT’s in Kobe next Wednesday. I’ll be able to explore the big city for a while and take some pictures. Will I accidentally wander into a “house of ill repute”, or end up losing my liver in a game of mahjongg to a hardened yakuza with a sword scar over his eye? Stay tuned!

Finally, something about Japan!

Did I lie? Did you think the truth was not in me?!?

I give you a few shots of Asago. More shall come as time goes by.

Here is the full album.

Still Alive

Yes, I am still alive. Somehow I’ve managed to survive for about 2 weeks so far in a foreign country where I don’t speak the language, without managing to somehow mangle, bankrupt and/or mortally embarrass myself. Still no internet access for the most part, so it will probably be a little longer until I can start updating regularly again. On the upside, the students at my Junior high school seem pretty cool, and the elementary kids are adorable, so I’m really psyched about this year.

For now, I leave you with the Joker paradox:

Nicholson Joker: actor still alive, character dies.

Ledger Joker: actor dies, character still alive.

The lesson being, I guess, that if you sign on to play the Joker, you better hope he gets killed off at the end of the movie.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I feel bad for finding the above hilarious. I need to go find somewhere dark and let my Catholic conscience systematically rend apart my self-esteem.

Preparations underway

I received the contract from the Asago Board of Education today, so it’s more or less totally official now. I’ll be flying up to Ottawa on the 24th of July, picking up my documents on the 25th and flying to Japan on the 26th. In the meantime, I’m busy with work and the logistics of moving to another country for a year.

One month hardly seems like enough time to pack up and move to the other side of the world. I’m actually more prepared than I thought I would be by this point, but that’s not stopping me from panicking. If I step back and consider it rationally, I know everything will easily be wrapped up by then.

But try telling that to the part of my brain which is currently running around in circles and shrieking in terror. That guy needs to mellow out.